Day Twenty Three.
“Avoid getting sucked into comparing yourself with others. Be a better version of yourself, not a better version of someone else. The world needs you”.
I’m always going to have that little niggle in the back of my mind when comparing myself with other mums. Should I be doing what they’re doing? Should I not be doing this? Why doesn’t my baby do that ? Why does their baby do that? I can’t help that. I’m human . There will always be something that I’ll feel that I’m not doing right. And my first thing to do is to look at others . I guess to check . For reassurance maybe.
I’ve been so much better since first writing my blog. And I have tried my best to become a better version of myself. I’m happy, I’m healthy, I’m a Mum, and a good one at that. And it has taken a long time to get to this stage. But, in a way , without this journey I don’t think I would have overcome all of the things I write about.
Rather than comparing to others , I’ve had realisation that it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter that my baby still doesn’t sit by himself and other babies do. My baby can’t hold his bottle yet, and others baby do. Because every baby and every person is different . And how can I compare anything when everyone is so different . That’s what makes us who we are.
I mean, I’ll admit I do have days when I’m at a wits end and I’m stressing and crying and my baby is stressing and crying and all I want to know is why. Why is this happening ? Does everyone else go through this? Is everyone else’s baby mental?
And yes . Every baby is growing and learning. And yes, some days they are all mental. But if I spent my days comparing like I used to, I wouldn’t get anywhere.
I will probably still be checking out other mums when my little man is 18. Because I guess I’ll never really understand . But, what I do understand is, that it’s OK to have your down days. It’s OK to freak out. It’s OK to raise your baby however you want to raise your baby.
My little man is 7 months old and he’s nearly crawling. Some of my Mum friends have already passed this stage. But however hard it is to not feel deflated, I know that he’ll get there when he is ready.
I also struggle with post-baby body struggles. And I am always checking out social media and looking at all those celebs that had a baby a week ago and have their abs back. I’m always comparing with them and that’s really hard. My partner is constantly having to reassure me that I look good. That I’ve tried so hard to get back to pre-baby body. But I don’t have the time to work that hard for abs. How do they do it?!
Comparison is everywhere and it’s hard not to look. I can’t help but look. But I have to try and remember that what I’m doing is great. It doesn’t matter about what everyone else is doing.
“The world needs you”. My little man is my world . And I know for a fact that he needs me. And I’ll always be there. Whatever time of day. Whatever shape or size. Wherever we are.